Bridesmaids, The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

Sometimes weddings bring out the best and worst in people. Bridal party dramas are the last thing you need in the lead up to the most important day of your life. We have some advice to help ensure your pack of minions stay in line, without the need to crack out the whip. 

When selecting your chosen few, keep in mind that this group may be in contact before the wedding, so make sure they are capable of ‘getting along’ with or without you there. Whether your bridesmaids are already friends or unfamiliar, arrange a dinner or brunch to introduce the group to each other. This will give them an opportunity to exchange details and meet prior to planning pre-wedding celebrations. If you are having a hens or kitchen tea party, give your bridesmaids some ideas of the things you would like to do and a list of guests to invite. This will make their job less stressful and also help ensure your expectations of a good time are met. Many bridal party groups will have disagreements on things like wedding attire and party planning, to eliminate the possibility of differences in opinion turning into catty disputes, don’t leave them with too many decisions to make as a group, especially if you have more than 2 bridesmaids.  

Consider asking a family member or your mother to host the bridal shower or kitchen tea if you desire more than one pre-wedding celebration. Your bridesmaids may not have the time or budget to cater for multiple events, so have realistic expectations of them. Remember, no one likes a ‘Bridezilla’, and ladies we all know that our inner princesses tend to make an appearance at some stage during wedding preparation. If your bridesmaids are behaving badly or trying to hijack your wedding by insisting on particulars, you need to approach the situation diplomatically and quickly. Hit the nail on the head by talking to her as soon as you get a chance; be sure you let her know that you care about her and that her behavior is directly impacting you. If she is a real friend she will back off and respect the fact that you are being open and honest with her.

If you require wedding planning assistance, make sure you keep your bridesmaids and groomsmen informed of things you need help with. Remember people are not mind readers and more often than not, willing to lend an extra hand when asked. It is important to select friends or family members who you know will participate in making your big day extra special and stress-free. If you and your partner decide to invite another couple to be part of your wedding party, make sure they're able to put differences aside throughout the event if their relationship appears to be on the rocks. There is nothing worse than a messy breakup between friends, especially if they are in your bridal party.

This magical day is about two people joining families and celebrating their love for each other. If you are lucky enough to have a large group of BFFs and struggling to decide on your bridal party, consider seating all of your nearest and dearest to avoid offending close friends. Western traditions are slowly taking a backseat so don’t feel like you need to honor them all. 

Image by Alma Photography 


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